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  • Writer's pictureAnya Smirnova

Trust Yourself

Updated: Apr 11, 2021

Mid-December each year, I like to sit down with my largest mug of tea and reflect on the achievements of this year, and what my hopes and aspirations are for the coming year. This is quite simply the best way I have found to finish the year on a good note and come up with the New Year resolutions that actually work! (Btw, our latest podcast episode is about NY resolutions and has a cool experiment on creating the resolutions that work! - check it out here.)  

I feel tired, but also fully charged - after seven months of WFH & homeschooling we came out the other end even closer as a family; 300+ women were supported through coaching and webinars; also I met two amazing collaborators who share my passion for supporting lawyers and working mums, which feels akin to finding a soul-mate. Frieda Levycky (lawyer & coach, like me) with whom we started the Lawer Life Experiment Podcast with a dream to have more healthy and happy people in law and nudge a change in the legal profession. Lori Mihalich-Levin (also a lawyer) with whom we have created the UK edition of the renowned Mindful Return Maternity Leave Course. I am so excited, delighted and proud to be offering the kind of support that I would have liked to have received myself when I needed it.

Also, every year I write down the lessons I learnt. The most unexpected and powerful lesson of this year (it's December 2020, the year of the Covid-19 pandemic) was to trust myself. 

This year we have all been challenged to decide what's important, what's permissible, what is the right way. Working from home with kids, giving birth in this pandemic environment, becoming a new mum, racial injustice, working in and leading hybrid teams, trusting someone you barely know to start a project together.

The loudest voice in our head that's causing us to hold back says "I'm not sure", "It's not my turn", "I'm an imposter", "I don't know enough", "It won't work", "I'm not supposed to do this", "It does not look professional enough". This is the voice of self-preservation but also self-doubt, it likes to comply with the rules and is very risk-averse. There is another voice we have that is intuitive - and if we learn to trust that part of ourselves, it unlocks a whole bunch of opportunities.

The work that I am most proud of this year and the best parenting I showed was originated by that intuitive voice.

The hours spent agonising about something or doubting my decisions came from ignoring my intuition and looking for reassurance, a confirmation of my rightness by someone else. What I learnt is that I should NOT be giving so much power to anyone else. When in doubt, making your own decisions is better than surrendering your power. 

Trust yourself as a woman, as a mum, as a professional, as an entrepreneur.



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